Dvblin

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Last weekend I finally made my way to Dublin, a place I’ve wanted to visit for years and years. It’s a beautiful city, a livable city. Whereas in Paris the greatest attractions are in tourist, landmark spots, in Dublin they are found in pubs and the walkway along the river Liffey, in everyday activities.

The exception is one simply unbelievably awesome tourist trap: Dvblinia.

Think of the cheesiest exhibit at a Renaissance festival possible. Now imagine it sprawled across 3 floors of a darkened 19th century neo-gothic building connected to the oldest cathedral in Dublin and you’ll have Dvblinia. Amazing.dvblinia-1a.jpg

After paying for your tickets at a desk manned by a bored older couple you enter a dark, empty, slightly musty smelling “Dublin fair”. Apparently Dublin fairs were often attacked by zombies because it had the eerie feeling of someplace abandoned and left to rot; motley colors mocking an aborted celebration. The “fair” twisted around a make-shift corridor created by “fair” booths: food, armor (with a sign encouraging you to try on a helmet; I don’t even want to know what might be crawling around in those helmets), spices, scribes. Exhibit after exhibit, empty even of fake people.

I reached the end of the “fair” and could hear a banging coming from the next room. In it was a woman, a live visitor, throwing something at another display. I figured maybe it was a reproduction of some medieval throwing game Dubliners played. But as I moved closer, I could see that it was a scene of a fake woman in stocks. The live woman was throwing fake vegetables at the fake woman. Over and over again she threw red plastic tomatoes: thwomp, thwomp, thwomp. I swear she did it for 5 minutes.

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The best display was the one about the Black Death. It was the liveliest.

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After two floors of such exhibits the third and final floor explored the life of ancient Vikings. Apparently they were insanely violent because all I can remember of it is a display of severed fake animal heads fake rotting on fake spikes. They didn’t really describe why Vikings decided to display rotting animal heads. They were just happy enough to reproduce it.

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The last time I was in Coney Island I went on a haunted house ride that’s the best ride I’ve ever ridden. It’s not scary exactly, but if you’re in the right frame of mind it’s a good four minutes of screaming and laughing. It’s just fantastic. Dvblinia is the best post-modern time I’ve had since then. If you ever go to Dublin and are in the mood for some old-fashioned po-mo, I highly recommend a visit.

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~ by kellly333 on April 9, 2007.

2 Responses to “Dvblin”

  1. Personally, I love the giant flea (or is it a louse?) in the picture of the Black Death. Classic.

  2. Very interesting. I’d like to see more gruesome things. Thnx

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